Sailing - His dream your dream!!Knowledge is powerful!living on a boat that doesn’t stay still and crossing oceans with no security is not for everyone. But if you want to understand and be part of your partners dream, knowledge is the key! Learn to sail independently and learn how to handle yourself in the different situations that can arise. There are some excellent schools and seminars that are designed to empower women and give them confidence at sea, coastal or off shore.
What the 1st mate should know!!
Know the boat … where everything is, safety gear, sea cocks, and how to put up the sails and start the engine. Know how to navigate and use a GPS, make trip reports and emergency calls on the radio. Know the joy, experience the fun and feel proud when you’ve met the challenge. It is so important that both partners understand the dynamics, and know what to do if the worst happens.
Communication with your partner can be even more important when on the water, identify fears, strong and weak points and work out each ones responsibility. Work out how to be equal partners on board, team work brings harmony! I know sailors who have two dinghies to give independence going ashore and having some space from one another. Finding a corner of the boat to read a book, or a walk along a beach. But don't forget to have fun together too!
Cruising in the company of others and meeting at destinations can be of benefit, giving moral support when needed. Female companionship can be very necessary, take time out together, lunch or some shopping when ashore. In company its fun to share sundowners, swap stories and plans for the next destination. I have never met a sailor who didn't enjoy a good story and a good laugh. And what do the ladies say??
• One female sailor tells her story ..... "I just sail around Narragansett Bay with no particular talent. Sailing is the only logical alternative to enjoying the water without actually having to be in it, and that's out for me! Nope...I can swim, but I know in my heart that absolutely everything in the water swims much better and faster than I can! Why tempt fate? My Significant Other is often frustrated with my rather timid "Fair Weather Only" approach to seafaring! In fact, I'm woefully deficient in 'nomenclature', as well. I often resort to terms such as 'thingy', especially in moments of intense pressure, like performing a tack in a 15k wind."
• Another sailor, Karen, gives her view ... “Love him ... but over living aboard ... want to kiss the dirt!” Karen continued ... “It’s his dream not mine any more!! Still love the life style, the people, and still feel very much at home on our yacht but just need to feel the land under my feet. He still lives aboard and I have a small unit a walk away from the marina. The simple things of going to the shower and not having to get dressed first, not having to venture out in bad weather to get the laundry done or go to the toilet block. It fits in better to live on land when you work for a living. And yes I feel our relationship is better for it!”
• Then there are stories like
Carmen's
... read about a brave lady who decided to continue to follow her dream of sailing after the loss of her husband, in the appropriately named catamaran ... Dream Weaver!
Enjoy Gord Kerr’s account of what it’s like sailing offshore , it’s entertaining and what it’s truly like! He should know as he has been circumnavigating the world with his wife Ginny for quite some time! Sex and Cruising! So you are set ‘to give it a go,’ maybe some what reluctantly so how do other women cope with full time cruising, keeping romance alive and sharing their partners dream?
Why not read one self professed landlubbers story after she agrees to circumnavigate the world with her husband. Joanna Hackett in her book ‘The Reluctant Mariner” speaks about topics and issues normally not mentioned in other cruising books, openly and with humor.
What about the romantic side of the cruising life? She says, ‘Noisy lovers entertain sailors on nearby yachts, as well as those on their own. Unless this is desired, the practice of quite sex is recommended and, even then, one should not be fooled that others on board are unaware of what is occurring.’
One cruising couple while enjoying some “afternoon delight” in the forward bunk ignored the calls from a neighboring yacht. But the neighbors undeterred, got in their dingy and came alongside, calling out to the preoccupied couple. It caused only a slight interruption and a bit of embarrassment for the visitors.
Sex is a fact of life .... and sex and cruising is not a new concept ..... I mean isn’t that just another reason why autopilots and radars are an essential piece of equipment on a cruising yacht?
Living aboard and sailing can brings it's own unique benefits! Back to the Cruising Life!
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